Shattered
by XThatsAProblemX
Summary: Instead of killing Mary Eunice, the Monsignor manages to perform an exorcism. But what will be left of the poor nun? *Spoilers for 2x10 The Name Game*
1. Chapter 1

Instead of killing Mary Eunice, the Monsignor manages to perform an exorcism. But what will be left of the poor nun?

(Inspired by an interview- which I conveniently cannot find, I'll keep looking -in which Lily Rabe said that Sister Mary Eunice would probably be really torn apart and not the same if she had survived and gone through an exorcism.)

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-

The Monsignor stared at Sister Mary Eunice. He could see only two ways to save her. The first way was to kill her. He could see in her eyes that that was what she wanted. The second was far more difficult. She was still looking up at him with pain written all over her face. If he threw her from this height, he would take that pain away for good. But could he really do that to this sweet young girl? No. He couldn't. His other option was dangerous and might kill her anyway, but it was a risk he needed to take.

"I want to let go," she sniffled. He kept his eyes on her.

"Then let go of me, Sister." For a moment, he thought she might let the demon take over before she had the chance to let go of him. And then her hands released his shirt and she stepped back. Her hands were raised in surrender.

Carefully executing his next move, Timothy grabbed her with one arm and held on. He caught her under her arms and swung her over the railing. With his free hand, the Monsignor freed his rosary and pressed it against her skin. He recited the verses he had been memorizing in preparation for this important moment. The devil took over her body and struggled, kicking and screaming. Or was it Mary Eunice?

"Let go! You can't do this!" The options were limited. If she tried to push him back with her mind, she would fall to her death. If she stopped fighting, the exorcism might be completed and the devil would be forced from her body. He kept reciting the verses despite her struggle. Her nails clawed at his arm and she tried to slam into his bandaged hand so he would let go. "Damn it, Timothy!" She growled. That was the devil talking, he was certain. He needed to press on.

Behind him, another voice shouted. Doctor Arden had run up the stairs after hearing Mary Eunice scream and seeing her held at such a great height.

"What on Earth is going on here?" Arden demanded. Sister Eunice tried to turn and meet his eyes. She stretched a hand in his direction while the other continued to claw at the Monsignor's arm.

"Please, Arthur! Help me!" She called. He did nothing but stare at her. The cross was still pressed to her forehead and he could see the unrestrained evil and evidence of manipulation in her eyes. If the Monsignor succeeded, that would be gone for good. The sweet girl he knew would return. The girl he loved would be restored. So he stood and waited.

The Monsignor was shouting now, fighting to be heard over Mary Eunice's increasingly vicious cries and curses. And then all at once, she stopped kicking and began to weep.

"Monsignor, let go. Please! I can't do this! I can't live with what I've done!" She tugged at his arm, but he held onto her as he began the final prayers. He was determined to save her soul without harming her. He tried not to believe that the harm was already done. "Please, just let me go!" She sobbed. Arden stepped forward. He couldn't handle watching her suffer.

"Timothy, hurry. I can't take much more of this." The Monsignor shouted the last lines of scripture into Mary Eunice's ear and her body tensed. The cross burned against her skin and she screamed in pain. They listened as the devil's voice bled out of her scream and she took in a shuddering breath. Her back arched at a horrifying angle, almost causing the Monsignor to lose his hold on her, and then her body went limp and all was silent.

"Help me get her over," Timothy said. His injured hand was having trouble holding her now that she was dead weight, but Dr. Arden rushed to help. Together they pulled her to the safe side of the railing and set her on the floor. Her veil had slipped off during her fight and now her hair surrounded her like a golden halo, standing out bright against the dark stone. Arthur checked her pulse and made sure she was breathing before taking her fragile body into his arms and carrying her down to the infirmary.

-x-x-x-

Mary Eunice woke slowly, keeping her eyes closed. Her entire body was sore and it felt… larger? No. It felt free, like a crushing pressure had been lifted from her soul. Memories crept back into her mind. She remembered the Monsignor holding her over the edge of the staircase. He had done it. He had exorcised the devil from her body.

She opened her eyes and found herself in the infirmary. Dr. Arden was in the chair next to her, asleep. Before she had learned about his past, his presence would have comforted her. Now, she was terrified. She twisted away from him out of instinct, but her body didn't cooperate and she fell off the bed. The sound woke Dr. Arden and she scrambled backwards away from him on the floor.

"Sister Mary Eunice? What's the matter?" He was so much taller than her. At least the bed was between them.

"S-S-Stay away from me," she whispered. It hurt to speak. She had screamed herself hoarse during the exorcism. Tears welled up in her eyes. Everything felt wrong. She pulled her knees into her chest and sobbed, curling up as small as she could. After a few minutes of this, she felt a hand on her shoulder and was pulled into a tight embrace.

"I'm sorry you had to learn the things you did," Arthur said softly. "I never meant for you to know. I didn't want to hurt you and I assure you that past is behind me."

"You k-killed people, innocent people."

"And so have you," he countered. He was right. Mary Eunice remembered taking the lives. It hadn't really been her, but her body had carried out that evil. And then her virtue had been stolen by the devil himself. She was tainted.

Forgetting her fear, she buried her face against Dr. Arden's chest and cried even harder.

Arthur sat quietly, stroking her hair as she broke down. "I'm sorry," he said. "I shouldn't have said that. It wasn't you doing all of those things." She shook in his arms, gasping between loud sobs. Her hysterics were loud enough to wake half the floor and he knew the violent crying would only cause her more pain. She didn't need any more pain.

"Mary Eunice, you're alright now. You will be forgiven. Try to calm down and breathe." When she didn't, he put his hands on her shoulders and pushed her body away from him. He held her face, forcing her tear-filled blue eyes to meet his. "Listen to me, Mary. You need to breathe. Concentrate on me and take a breath every time I do." He inhaled and she copied him. He exhaled slowly. Her breath shook and turned into another sob. "No, no. _Breathe_." He took another slow breath, making sure she followed him, and kept going until Mary Eunice's sobs faded into silent crying. "Good," he whispered, pulling her back into him. They sat there for a long time saying nothing, tears soaking into Arthur's shirt. He rubbed her back and let her cry.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-

I'd really appreciate any feedback you may have! Like tell me if you think I should continue or how I'm doing and remember suggestions are welcome! Not any horrible criticism though please, please, _please._ (I'm so awful at taking criticism. I'll probably just curl into a ball and feel like a failure and never move again. It will be sad.) Thanks for reading! :D


	2. Chapter 2

_Thank you for the reviews and the positive feedback! So glad to have such fabulous readers! Here is another chapter for you._

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-

It was the middle of the night when Mary Eunice woke up. She'd cried herself to sleep in Dr. Arden's arms and he must have put her back in bed. He wasn't there now and she found herself strangely disappointed. The room was so quiet that the faint echo of her own breathing started to get to her. She couldn't stand it. At that moment, she needed to be anywhere else.

She got out of bed as quietly as she could in case they'd left another nun around to keep an eye on her. There was a patient restrained in one of the beds she passed so she stayed silent, breathing easier once she was safely out of the infirmary.

The floor was cold against her feet and her nightgown couldn't keep out the chill. She'd never noticed just how desolate Briarcliff was. Looking up at the high ceiling and the staircase where she'd nearly died made her uneasy and a creeping draft brushed over her skin. Everything about this place made her feel cold and empty. How had she ignored it for so long? She wrapped her arms around herself and kept walking.

Mary Eunice didn't know where she was going. Her feet climbed the stairs of their own accord, carrying her higher until she reached a door on the third floor.

Sister Jude's office.

Well, it had been Sister Jude's. Mary Eunice had changed that and taken it from her. She stood in front of the frosted glass pane and remembered all the times she'd come into this office seeking advice. Sister Jude had been the one person whose judgment she trusted and feared above all others. Even God's word had barely surpassed Jude's in Mary Eunice's mind. They had shared a relationship that was closer than any of the other nuns. Jude was the closest thing to a mother that Mary Eunice had ever known and she'd favored the young nun for her loyalty and innocence. There had always been a familial love and warmth between them. The devil had used that weakness to break them both.

She rested her hand against the door for a moment before turning and walking back toward the staircase. Her eyes found their way to the railing on the landing. She placed her hands on it and looked down over the edge. The floor was so far below her. She wondered what would have happened if the Monsignor had let go of her.

_Just do it. You know you want to. There is nothing left for you in this life,_ A voice in her mind whispered. It was her voice, but emotionless and cruel. Her mind was turning against her just as her body had.

"Stop," she said aloud.

_The devil took everything from you. Your virtue is gone. How dare you stand and call yourself a nun? You're a sinner, Mary Eunice. Because you were weak and _stupid. _There's no other excuse. Now you should pay for what you've done._

"Please," she whispered to herself. Her voice shook. "Just stop. I didn't do anything wrong. God will forgive me."

_The only one who can stop this is you. End it and spare everyone the trouble._

She felt the air stir and turned to see a woman in black standing beside her. It was Shachath. Mary Eunice remembered her all too well. Last time she'd seen the angel, she had begged to be released from life. Maybe now was her time after all.

"You're here for me?" She asked. The angel shook her head and smiled.

"No, I'm here to stop you."

"Why? I can't do anything right, I've hurt everyone I know. This is the only way to stop the suffering."

"Don't listen to that voice. I know you can hear it. It comes from the last remnants of evil that are clinging to your soul. It will fade with time, but you must be strong." The angel placed her hand on Mary Eunice's shoulder. "I know what you are capable of. You must be a force of good and fight the evil here."

"I'm too weak. And I'm not good enough," she trembled. Surely the angel knew what awful things she'd done. "That voice is right. I've committed murder and tortured people and allowed my body to be violated. I'm a monster."

"None of that was your fault. You were strong enough to maintain a hold on your sanity after your mind and body were held hostage. You've never given in to true temptation or sin. Everything you believe you did was the work of someone else. The monster was inside of you, but it did not _become_ you. If you intend to survive, you must remember that." Mary Eunice stared at her in confusion.

"Why are you helping me? What am I compared to your kind?"

"You're asking why I'm meddling in human lives?" Shachath asked, surprised.

"Yes. It doesn't make sense. Your domain is death. Why should you care about this place or any of us until we die?" She felt Shachath's calm gaze study her intently.

"The ones who said you were stupid were clearly mistaken. You notice much more than you let on," she took her hand from Mary Eunice's shoulder. "There is more evil and death here than you can imagine. Never have I visited a place so touched by the shadow of cruelty. It makes my job difficult and it disturbs the balance. Evil is claiming more of the world than it should. This place is only contributing to the chaos."

"So you want… what? To destroy it?"

"That is one option. The other is to restore it. The good can be brought back. With your help, Briarcliff could stop being cruel and start to truly help the people it contains." Mary Eunice shook her head.

"There's no way. I wouldn't know how."

"Oh but you do know. You know everything that goes on here. The devil may have taken some of your purity, but he gave you something in return. He gave you the ability to see what you could not before, the injustice and coldness and horror that you've been blind to all this time." Mary Eunice thought for a moment then shook her head.

"I can't do it. There's too much and I'm not strong enough."

"You won't work alone. There is another here who can see things for what they are, but it may break her if you aren't here to help. Jude needs you, just as she always has."

"Sister Jude?" Mary Eunice asked hopefully. "She's alright?"

"She can be," Shachath offered. "But you must stay with her. You must protect her from herself and those who would silence her."

"Who would do that?"

"You know the answer to that question." And she did. She'd seen the Monsignor's thirst for power and knew he would fight to keep the asylum a success. The thought of having to challenge his endless ambition was terrifying. Realizing how difficult this endeavor would be, she began to cry. A tear slid down her face, only to be brushed away by Shachath.

"Don't cry. You're too strong to cry. That scared and innocent part of you is gone now. You have to let it go if you wish to continue."

"But I don't want to continue. That's why you're here."

"That's not true. You want to live. That's the beauty of what I do, I know how you really feel. Deep down, you know that you can do this. That part of you wants to keep fighting and you have to let it."

"But-" Shachath grabbed her shoulders and held them tightly. Her face was serious and Mary Eunice squirmed under her sharp gaze. The angel's voice was louder, harsher. For a moment, she took on the air of a fierce warrior, leading Mary Eunice into battle.

"No. You will fight. You have been saved for this mission. This is your purpose now. Until you succeed, the balance cannot be restored. You will do this because it is your duty and His will. If you defy Him now, your soul will be forsaken for eternity and you will not see me again. There will be no rest for you at the end of this life. You have no other choice." She released the wide-eyed nun and stepped back. The passion in her eyes faded and she was once again a calm and benevolent servant of God. "I will come for you when you've succeeded."

"And what if I fail?" Mary Eunice sniffled.

"You won't." And with that, she vanished.


	3. Chapter 3

_So many fabulous readers and reviewers! Thank you guys so much for your input and support! _

_The rest of the week is going to be pretty chaotic for me, but I have free time and an empty house after Friday night so I'm sure you'll have another update by the end of this weekend. Just don't think I've abandoned you!_

_-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-_

"You need to eat, Mary Eunice," the other nun chided. Mary Eunice sighed and set her book down in her lap. Last night's venture into the asylum had been alright as far as moving went, but she was still being held in the infirmary until they could get her back to herself. While being possessed, her body had been seriously neglected. She'd lost weight from not eating and could barely hold down anything they fed her.

"I can't. It'll make me sick just like it did this morning. I don't want to go through that again." Her nurse frowned.

"If you don't eat, we'll have to start force-feeding you like a patient."

"That's cruel," she replied.

"That's protocol and you know it." The nun sighed. She was a plump older woman with a permanently sour expression from working at Briarcliff for over half of her life. She was used to dealing with patients that she had total authority over. Mary Eunice was making her job harder. "At least eat some soup to get your strength back. Dr. Arden has ordered that you won't be allowed out of this bed and back to work until you're in good health. He's hounding us all to make sure you get well."

"I know," she grumbled. Sitting here and being babysat was becoming incredibly boring and she needed to see Jude as quickly as possible. "Just bring me the soup."

As soon as the older nun left the room, she was confronted by Dr. Arden. He stepped into her path and nearly scared her to death.

"How is she, Sister Lenore?"

"You could warn a woman, you know," she huffed, glaring at him. She kept walking in the direction of the kitchen and Dr. Arden followed. "But she's fine as far as I can tell. Getting sick this morning put her off eating but I've convinced her to try a bowl of soup at the very least. I'll bring some bread, too, and I guarantee she'll eat it. The girl must be starving."

"Yes. But does she seem… mentally stable?" He asked quietly. They reached the kitchen and Sister Lenore set out to getting Mary Eunice's food together.

"She's snippy today, but I gave her a book to occupy her and she hasn't started talking to the walls yet." Arden frowned in distaste and she apologized. "I was joking. She's perfectly fine other than her attitude problem."

"She's tired. That can happen after such a traumatic experience," he explained. "She needs time to rest and readjust."

"What did you say happened again?" Lenore asked, narrowing her eyes at him.

"We aren't sure. The Monsignor and I tried to calm her down after she came into his office in hysterics. She worked herself into an awful state and then fainted."

"Yes, some of us heard her screaming in the hall. Nobody wanted to pry so we kept on working." She sliced a piece of bread and set it on a tray with a bowl of hot soup. "Mary Eunice is the youngest nun here and she has always been the most fragile. Perhaps the stress was too much. Working with some of these people can be taxing for those who aren't as strong."

"I'm sure she's plenty strong enough. She just needs to rest now and get herself together. Thank you for helping, Sister."

"It's no trouble. I'm always glad to help a lost soul." Arden nodded and turned, leaving Lenore alone in the kitchen. She muttered to herself, "But if she keeps up the attitude I won't hesitate to sedate her."

The tired nun picked up the tray and made her way back to the infirmary. "I've got your soup." She called, rounding the divider between the beds. Mary Eunice wasn't there. She set the tray down on the bedside table.

"This place exists to make my life difficult," she sighed.

-x-x-x-x-

Mary Eunice made her way through the hallway and to her room in the opposite side of the asylum without being stopped. Most of the nuns left when their day of work was done, returning to the house their convent owned a few miles away. Mary Eunice was one of the very few who had decided to board here instead. Opening the door quietly, she slipped into the room and got dressed in her habit.

She turned and looked in the small mirror on her wall. As she glanced away, she noticed something strange. There was a red mark on her neck that had been hidden by her hair. She traced its shape and frowned. Having a cross-burn scar on her neck was sure to attract questions. She fastened her habit the rest of the way and put on her veil. Then she tilted her neck to see if the scar was visible, thanking God when it wasn't.

"One less thing to worry about," she said to herself.

Mary Eunice smiled at her uniformed reflection. Being back in those heavy black garments made her feel more secure. She had felt exposed in her loose nightgown with her hair flowing in every slight draft and getting in her face. Now she felt composed and in control.

_You'd look better in red,_ the voice in her head chimed in. She closed her eyes and clenched her jaw. It wasn't her thought, it was just the leftover evil talking. She told herself to stay calm and think logically.

"No I wouldn't."

_The Monsignor might disagree. _This got to her. She hated thinking about him after what they'd done.

"Don't say that! He didn't want it and neither did I."

_He didn't before. I bet if you went to him now he might change his mind. He'd be perfectly willing to let you have another ride. _Images of the Monsignor, mid-act, came flooding through her mind. The scene played and she couldn't stop it. She could hear his moans and her own heavy breathing as she slid onto him. He had begged her to stop- And then begged her to keep going as he groaned in ecstasy._ Well you didn't enjoy it quite as much as he did, but don't pretend you didn't like the way he felt inside of you._

"Shut up," she snapped. "Shut up!" There was a low chuckle in her mind and she counted backwards from ten until her anger and disgust faded enough to think clearly. The voice was silent. "Good." She took another few seconds to breathe calmly, keeping her eyes closed. The images of the Monsignor disappeared. "Good."

Checking outside the door in case Sister Lenore came looking for her, Mary Eunice left her room. She was going to find Jude and tell her what Shachath had said.

First, Mary Eunice decided to check the common room. It was the most likely option. Patients were everywhere and all of them seemed to shrink back from her as she walked through the room.

"Sister Jude?" she called quietly. She turned and suddenly Lana Winters was standing in front of her.

"You have the gall to come in here and try to torment her after what you did?" She demanded. "That woman has suffered enough because of you."

"No, please. Listen-" She held up her hands as a gesture of peace.

"There is no way in hell I'm listening to you." Lana grabbed fistfuls of the nun's habit and pulled her dangerously close, growling with rage. "You're a sadist and a monster. Leave Jude alone." Mary Eunice's first instinct was to break down sobbing and apologize for what she'd done to them both, but she remembered Shachath's warning to let go of that weak part of her. She stood her ground and looked Lana in the eyes.

"Ms. Winters, please let go of me. I'm not going to hurt Jude. I need to speak to her."

"I don't believe you." Other patients were staring at the confrontation in front of them. Mary Eunice shook her head, her hands still held up at her sides.

"You don't have to believe me. I know that lately I've been in the wrong-"

"You tortured her! You cranked that machine high enough to fry her for good! And you brought back that maniac, Thredson, to torture me!" Tears began to fill Lana's eyes and she shook Mary Eunice by her habit. "I'm still carrying that monster's child because of you," she whispered furiously.

"Lana," Mary Eunice said softly. She looked at the other woman with pity and apology in her eyes. "I know what I did and I am sorry, but I need to find Jude. She's the only one who can help fix any of this." Lana held her gaze for a long time then released the nun and stepped away.

"Find her yourself, you lying bitch." Mary Eunice stared straight ahead, slack-jawed. She took a second to process what had happened.

Of course Lana didn't trust her. She'd trusted the devil inside of her to call the police days ago and instead she had released Bloody Face and hired him full time. Lana shouldn't trust her now and in her position, Mary Eunice would be just as wary. It made sense, she told herself. Reasoning it that way almost stopped her from tearing up. Almost.

Mary Eunice set her jaw and turned on her heel, regaining her strong, steely exterior to continue her mission. No one but Lana saw her wipe away the last traces of her weakness.

-x-x-x-x-x-

Jude heard a distinct and familiar clicking in the hallway. It was the sound of a very anxious young girl walking towards her door. But she had to be wrong. Whatever they were giving her must have been making her hear things, because that walk belonged to the innocent Mary Eunice and that girl was long gone.

The lock slid and the door creaked open slowly.

"Sister Jude?" A small voice called. "It's me-"

"I know who you are," Jude spat. "Or at least who you claim to be. You walk in her skin, but you're not her. You're an imposter." Mary Eunice stepped into the room and shut the door behind her.

"No, Sister. It's really me." In the light streaming through the barred window, she looked sickly. She seemed too pale and too thin. Jude supposed she probably did too. After being fried a few days ago, Jude had been looking much worse.

"You think I'm going to believe a master manipulator? The devil says what you want to hear. Even she would know that." Mary Eunice moved even closer, sitting on the edge of the bed.

"The Monsignor performed an exorcism, Sister Jude. I'm not possessed. I'm not the devil anymore." She tugged the back of her habit and the buttons popped open, revealing the cross branded into the skin of her neck. Jude reached to touch it, but Mary Eunice flinched away. She tried again and brushed her fingers over the scarred flesh. "It's from his rosary."

"The Monsignor did this?" Jude asked. Mary Eunice could still hear a skeptical tone in her voice, but it was less certain.

"Yes. He was driven to it after…" She trailed off. She was afraid to tell Jude what she'd done.

"What is it? What did you do to him?"

"It wasn't just what I did to him, it's all of the things I did. They all hit me and I knew I had to stop." She didn't cry this time, instead staying quiet and calm. "I fought my way through and told him I was sorry. I was just so tired… I wanted him to kill me, but he didn't." To her surprise, Jude sat up and leaned closer to her.

"I told him to kill you, too," Jude said. "It would have been easier on you."

"You mean you believe me?" Mary Eunice asked. Jude covered Mary Eunice's hand with one of her own. She couldn't feel the overwhelming evil anymore. Some powerful gut instinct told her that her prayers had truly been answered.

"Of course I do. I can tell that it's gone."

"How?"

"Before, with the devil, you were cold. I can feel your warm heart again. I've been able to sense a lot of things." She gestured the girl closer. "Come here and let me button that for you." Mary Eunice shifted so that Jude could reach the buttons on her back. "Tell me what you did to him."

"I don't want to," she admitted, picking nervously at her fingernails.

"Let it out. I won't judge you or criticize you. You learned what I did and you still don't judge me, and for that I'm thankful. And I know you couldn't have controlled it. You can tell me anything, Mary Eunice. Just think of it as a confession. It's as simple as that." She'd finished buttoning the young nun's habit, but Mary Eunice didn't turn to face her. She lowered her head and sat on the edge of the bed with her elbows on her knees. She took a steadying breath while Jude watched her work up the courage to say the words out loud.

"I-…" She shook her head. "The _devil_ raped him. With my body." Jude said nothing. She stared at Mary Eunice as she sat and started to cry. This crying was different than the shaking sobs she was used to seeing. Mary Eunice was perfectly controlled and silent. She knew that must be just the beginning of the changes that had come over the poor girl's soul. "He begged me to stop but I couldn't. I couldn't fight," she said. Her voice broke as she added, "It hurt."

"Come here," Jude said, opening her arms. Mary Eunice fell into her embrace without another word. "I want you to listen to me. I've been given a gift. My mind is back and I know more than I ever have. With that gift, I can tell that you're still pure in the only way that matters. Your heart and mind are still faithful. Mary Eunice, you've done nothing wrong. You said yourself that there was no way to fight, but you still tried and God will accept that." She squeezed the girl and continued. "The Monsignor will be able to move on. He doesn't plan on leaving the church and neither should you."

"But Sister-," Mary Eunice began, pulling back. Her eyes were red and Jude wiped the tears from her cheeks. Despite everything, she was still so innocent.

"You have to stay and help fight whatever else is going on here. We're not at the end of our struggle. I can feel it."

"That's what she told me, too."

"What who told you?"

"The angel, Shachath." Jude grabbed Mary Eunice's hands.

"Why did she come to you? Did you call for her? Mary Eunice, you must be careful. I know that this has been difficult for you, but you can't give up. You've already overcome so much," she pleaded.

"I did call for her, I think, but she wouldn't take me. She gave me a mission from God." Mary Eunice squeezed Jude's hands. Her eyes were clearer now, bright with excited energy. "We have to take back Briarcliff. She said that together you and I could restore the good here and bring back balance between dark and light. She told me that I was saved from the devil so I could help fix this place. I don't know how, but it's our only option." She didn't tell Jude what her punishment would be if they didn't succeed. Jude would have been heartbroken imagining the young nun's soul wandering this horrid place for eternity.

"It's not our only option," Jude said quietly. Her mind was telling her there was another way. "We could destroy it."

"Yes, we could. She said that would work. But I believe we can do this the right way."

"Mary-"

"Please, Sister Jude. We have to at least try."

Jude looked at Mary Eunice for a long time. There was so much desperation and hope in her eyes, so much of her old self, that Jude couldn't help but smile. Their mission to restore this place was destined to fail, of that she was certain. Jude understood that the only way to fulfill God's will was to destroy the asylum but, looking at the girl in front of her, she decided to let Mary Eunice hold onto her hope for as long as she could.

"Of course," she said. "We can do this. We'll make it right."


	4. Chapter 4

_Thank you again for reading and reviewing! I started writing as soon as I got home from my show last night so I could get you guys an update. _

_I've also worked out most of what I want to do, but don't forget that you can leave me any suggestions and feedback you may have (As long as it's not really mean)._

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Sister Lenore and Dr. Arden had been waiting in the infirmary when Mary Eunice returned. They saw her and immediately rounded on her like a pair of furious, concerned parents. After a long lecture on her physical health and a good deal of pleading on Mary Eunice's part, it had been decided that she could return to work. The only conditions that were set were that she be seen eating three meals a day, took breaks every hour, and that she went to bed at nine every night.

"I'm not a child, Sister Lenore," she whined after hearing the last rule. She was sitting on the infirmary bed with both Lenore and Arden looking down at her. She'd never felt so small and she absolutely hated it.

"One of the night guards saw you wandering out of the infirmary the other night. I don't trust that you've been sleeping at all, but you need to start. Sleep fights sickness in the mind as well as in the body," Lenore said.

"She's right," Dr. Arden agreed. "I want you getting a healthy amount of sleep each night if you're to return to work."

"I don't need to be babysat!" She shouted. Dr. Arden frowned at her outburst and she looked down at her lap. "I'm sorry. I understand that you're thinking of what's best for me, but I can take care of myself."

"We know you can, Mary Eunice, but we want to make sure that you _will_ be taking care of yourself," Sister Lenore said calmly. "Over the past few weeks you're been starving yourself and running your body into the ground with exhaustion. You need to be healthy and rested if you want to take on the stress of this job." Mary Eunice looked from Lenore to Arthur. He shrugged to show that even he agreed with this point. Seeing no other way to end the conversation, she nodded.

"I understand."

"Good. Now that we've settled that, you can eat your soup and start off with the midday medicine rounds," Sister Lenore ordered. "I trust that you'll make sure she eats?" She asked Arden.

"Of course, Sister. She's in good hands." The older woman smiled and exited the infirmary, leaving Arthur and Mary Eunice alone. He picked up the bowl of soup, which was now almost cold, and handed it to her. "Eat." She made a face, but took the bowl and started to eat while he sat down and looked at her charts. "She's right. You've lost an unsettling amount of weight over the past few weeks. Have you been eating at all?" She shrugged.

"I don't remember," she mumbled, swallowing another spoonful of the soup. It was thin, with noodles and miniscule chunks of chicken, but it was better than what they gave the patients. Her stomach protested after the first few minutes and she felt her insides squirm. Arden noticed and handed her a glass of water from the tray. She took a small sip and waited. The nausea passed. "Thank you."

"Pardon my asking, but what do you remember?" She set the water back on the tray and continued eating the soup.

"Almost everything," she answered. "I remember the more… disturbing details. The everyday things didn't seem important. I don't think the devil took any notice of my body's needs and eating wasn't as pressing to me as everything else. I didn't even realize." He held out the bread and took the empty bowl from her. "And I don't remember sleeping unless it was absolutely necessary. I went for days without it, until I could barely walk or I started slurring my words or my body was simply too tired to keep going." She ate the bread and watched Dr. Arden.

"How many people did you murder?" He asked after a minute.

"I don't want to talk about that." He nodded and folded his hands in his lap.

"You'll have to talk about it at some point. You can't move on until you let it out."

"Yes, but I don't have to tell you or anyone else. God is the only one who needs to know."

"Fair enough," he said.

"Besides," she added. "It wasn't me."

-x-x-x-x-x-

The halls were mostly quiet as she pushed the med cart towards the common room. She could hear the muffled sounds of the juke box through the doors and wondered briefly why the devil had wanted such a thing. An oversized music box was hardly an instrument of evil. She supposed it had probably been a dig at Jude. Oh, well. Perhaps some things couldn't be explained. As soon as she pushed through the doors, a chorus of noises and shouts mingled with the music. The patients still rushed to get out of her way.

"Everyone line up for your medication," she called to them. They were all hesitant and afraid. Nobody made a move towards her. From the back of the room, behind the other patients, Jude came forward. She strode through them confidently, looking like a figure of authority even in her thin standard-issue gown.

"Come on. We have to take it. There's no other option," she said loudly. Still, they stayed away. Mary Eunice stood at the side of the cart. Jude turned and shrugged. "Well, sister. Give me my pills." Mary Eunice picked up the right cup of pills and a cup of water and passed them to Jude. She made a show of holding up the paper cup and turning to show the other patients that she was cooperating. She turned back to Mary Eunice and pretended to swallow the pills, handing them to the younger nun and throwing the empty water cup in the trash.

"Thank you," Mary Eunice whispered. Other patients timidly stepped forward and began taking their meds. Jude nodded and walked away, sitting back on one of the dusty couches next to Lana.

"What the hell was that?" Lana asked, staring at Jude. "Why would you do that?"

"I took my meds. That's what we're supposed to do." She leaned back against the couch and lit a cigarette. "It's easier when you cooperate."

"Easier for us or for them?"

"Both." Lana shook her head in confusion. Jude could tell she was upset.

"Why are you helping her? That woman has been nothing but horrible to you. Two days ago you were drooling all over yourself because she tried to _kill_ you." When that didn't get a response, she grabbed Jude's arm and pulled her so they were face to face. "She tried to fry your brain into nothing and you're helping her."

"I did the same thing to you. How quickly did you forgive me?"

"Don't you dare compare that to this. She is so much worse than you ever were." Jude could see her trying to justify her hatred. She didn't know that Mary Eunice was an innocent pawn in the devil's game, all she saw was the woman who had protected Oliver Thredson.

"I know what you see in her, but you don't know the full story. You should know better than anyone not to accuse without facts." Lana's annoyance turned to rage instantly.

"How dare you tell me what to think about her after everything she's done? You're only defending her because she was your favorite. She must have really screwed you up in the head if you find anything but pure, sadistic evil in that girl."

Kit plopped down into a chair next to them. He saw the expression on Lana's face and frowned.

"What's goin' on?" he asked.

"Jude is protecting that bitch nun," Lana spat.

"Sister Mary Satan?" he said in disbelief. The irony of that nickname was lost on all of them except Jude. "Why?"

"Don't call her that," Jude said quietly. She took a drag of her cigarette. "And I'm helping her because she was in a dark place and she needs someone to bring her back into the light."

"Are you crazy?" Kit got out of his chair and knelt in front of Jude. "You can't help her. She knows I'm innocent and she knows that Thredson is a killer. There is something wrong with her and nothin' you do is gonna make her right. You can't fight that kinda evil, Jude."

"Neither of you understand!" Jude shouted. Kit stood and backed away from her. She smashed her cigarette into the ashtray and got up from the couch.

"Is there something wrong, Jude?" Mary Eunice walked across to them, pushing the cart of pills in front of her. There was genuine concern in her face as she approached Jude, but Lana and Kit moved between the two of them.

"I told you to leave her alone," Lana said. The hatred still burned in her eyes and Mary Eunice tried to ignore it.

"For God's sake, Lana. Get out of my way." She shoved Kit and Lana to the side and grabbed Mary Eunice by the shoulder.

"Sister Jude!" Mary Eunice gasped.

"They need to see it, Mary Eunice. I won't listen to any more of this." She pulled the girl in front of her, facing Lana, and tugged hard at the collar of her habit. The buttons popped open and her neck and scar were fully exposed. Mary Eunice closed her eyes and held her breath as Lana raised her hand. She was expecting a blow for some reason, but instead Lana traced the cross-shaped scar.

"It's a scar. What does that prove?" Kit asked.

"It's from her exorcism," Jude answered. She could feel Mary Eunice's heavy breathing and anxiety at being so exposed in front of them. If the other patients noticed anything, they didn't show it. Everyone continued milling about as usual.

"Exorcisms aren't real." Lana poked at the scar, and Mary Eunice winced. "Why would you do this to yourself?"

"I didn't," Mary Eunice whispered. She was still looking at the ground, paralyzed.

"So you expect us to believe you were possessed?" Lana was teasing now, cruel and angry. She poked at the scar harder, causing Mary Eunice to cry out in pain. "Is this where the cross burned when the demon was dragged out of your body?"

"Yes," she choked. She'd told herself over and over that she wasn't going to cry, and she fought as hard as she could to control the urge to let it all go.

Why couldn't Lana believe? There had to be some way Mary Eunice could convince her that she was on the right side. It hit her and she raised her head to meet Lana's eyes. "You haven't taken your medicine Ms. Winters." She pulled away from Jude and buttoned her habit, turning back to the cart. One of the paper cups was for Lana, but there was something else she needed. She bent to check the cart's lower shelf, looking for the right bottle.

"I'm not going to take anything from you. Nice try, Sister Satan." Mary Eunice paused at the nickname, feeling a chill pass through her. Jude put a hand on her shoulder.

"They don't know. It's not her fault," Jude muttered. Mary Eunice swallowed and nodded, returning to her task. She found a bottle with a promising-looking warning label and shook it, hearing the rattle of pills. She opened it and poured out three, and put them in the cup with the others. "Good," Jude said, understanding exactly what was going on. Mary Eunice held out the pills to Lana.

"No. I told you I won't."

"Lana…" Jude warned. "You should."

"I won't take anything this bitch gives me and I can't believe you think I should!"

"Ms. Winters," Mary Eunice said calmly. "Don't make me bring in someone to hold you down. We can make you take your meds or you can do it yourself. You seem like a very strong and independent woman. I'm sure you can handle this." Lana searched her face to see if she was bluffing.

"You wouldn't. If you've really changed, you wouldn't."

"I have changed. More than you seem to believe. But you really don't want to take that risk, do you?" They stared at each other for a long time before Lana snatched the cup of pills. She continued to stare at Mary Eunice as she swallowed them all dry. "Thank you for cooperating."

"Fuck you." She tossed the paper cup at the nun and stalked back to the couch. Kit followed her, glancing back at Jude and Mary Eunice with a look of betrayal and disgust. Mary Eunice put the pill bottle away and sighed.

"She'll never trust me. Nobody will."

"They need time to come around. What you did will help, but you need to fix the Thredson situation if you want them to truly believe you."

"I know." She looked up at Jude. "I don't know what to do."

"The answer will come to you when you face the problem. For now, you need to focus on helping Lana with what you just did. She'll be in the infirmary by the time it gets dark. Make sure you're there."

"It was the right thing to do," she said. Jude could hear the uncertainty. Her eyes were asking for confirmation. She needed Jude to confirm that she made the right choice.

"It was," Jude agreed. "But you have to follow through." Mary Eunice nodded.

"I'll be there after I finish the rounds." She took the cart and pushed it back through the common room doors. "It was the right thing to do," she repeated to herself.

_Murderer._

Mary Eunice groaned as the voice interrupted her thoughts again. It was true. She'd given Lana a drug that she was certain would kill her baby. But she knew what would have become of that child. When she was possessed she'd been able to see everything that he would've been. She had to do it to stop more murder and more pain for Lana and the child himself. It was a mercy killing.


	5. Chapter 5

_Another chapter! This one is a smidge shorter than the last two, but I've been busy and I didn't want you to think I'd forgotten. As always, thank you for reading and reviewing!_

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-

"Alright, time for bed!" A nun called through the common room. Jude watched Lana from a couch on the opposite side of the room. She'd left the other woman alone after their argument earlier, but she was keeping an eye on her.

"Let's go Kit," Lana said, nudging his foot. He had been staring at the wall, lost in thought. He did that a lot now that the baby had been taken away. Kit shook himself and focused on her. "We can pass by Grace's room before you go to yours."

"Yeah." He smiled at the idea of seeing Grace, and Lana smiled back. She stood from the couch and immediately doubled over, crying out in pain. Jude bolted across the room and held her arm. "What's goin' on?" Kit asked, clearly panicked.

Lana groaned and curled into herself, kneeling on the floor, and the nun at the door left to get help. Patients were already reacting with anxious cries, yelling and pushing the room into a frenzy of noise. Jude shushed them and turned back to Lana.

"Try to stay calm. It's going to hurt for a while," Jude said to her. "Just stay here. Stay with me… Lana, look at me." She did as she was told and Jude could see how afraid she was. "You're going to be alright."

"What did she do to me?"

"She's helping the only way she can."

"What did she do?!" She shook and began crying. "She gave me something! She poisoned me!" Jude knew she wouldn't listen. She was too focused on her fear.

"That bitch poisoned her?!" Kit screamed. His defensive nature was practically pouring out of him.

Arden rushed through the doors, followed by a muscular orderly, the nun on duty, and Sister Mary Eunice. Jude tried to grab Kit before he moved, sensing what he was about to do, but he lunged a second before she reached out. He balled his hand into a fist and swung at Mary Eunice. The orderly grabbed him as soon as he hit her, but she ended up with a bloody lip.

"Let me go! She deserved it!" Kit kept screaming and fighting to get free as he was dragged out of the room. "That bitch poisoned Lana! She's a murderer and she's protectin' the real Bloody Face! I'll fuckin' kill her! Let me go!" The door shut behind him.

"Are you okay, Sister?" Arden asked, turning to help her. She waved him away, wiping the blood from her face.

"I'm fine. Ms. Winters needs you." She was shaken, but Jude saw her close off from the pain and zero in on Lana. Arden knelt to Lana's level and got her attention.

"Ms. Winters are you experiencing any pain?" She nodded. "Where does it hurt?"

"My stomach. It's- Ah!" She grabbed Jude's arm and squeezed, her nails digging in painfully. Arden looked down and saw blood on the floor beneath Lana.

"Are you pregnant, Ms. Winters?" She didn't hear him. Her eyes were closed and she was trying to ignore the pain. Jude shook her.

"Lana, answer him."

"What?" Lana asked, turning to Jude.

"Dr. Arden asked you a question."

"Are you pregnant?" He repeated. She looked up and locked eyes with Mary Eunice.

"Yes," she whispered. Arden looked to Jude and shook his head.

"She's having a miscarriage."

"I'm what?" Lana asked through gritted teeth, squeezing Jude again.

"You are miscarrying. Your baby is dying. I'm not sure if there's anything we can do."

"Don't," she said, eyes suddenly wild and alert. Her free hand shot out and grabbed his coat, clinging to him. "Don't do anything!"

"But-" he began.

"No! Don't do anything! Don't try to stop it. Please." Jude put a hand on Arden's arm.

"Listen to her. This is the way it has to be," she said. He stared at her. "Just let it happen."

"Fine." He pulled Lana's hand off of his jacket and stood. "I want her to stay in the infirmary. We'll get one of the sisters to look after her until it's over."

"I will," Mary Eunice offered. Lana wasn't paying attention, so she didn't protest. There was still blood creeping from Mary Eunice's lip and a faint bruise was starting to appear. Kit had really done a number on her. Arden touched her lip gently. He was probably closer than was appropriate for most co-workers, but Mary Eunice was looking up at him eagerly, too determined to care about his proximity. "Please, Dr. Arden?"

"I'd rather have you safe in bed than dealing with this extra stress. We can find another-" She cut him off.

"No, I need to help her... It's my fault," she said softly. Her eyes welled up and she looked down, sniffling. She didn't _want_ to manipulate him, but she needed to be the one to stay with Lana and she knew how to make it happen. "I must have given her the wrong medication. It was my job and I did it wrong. I have to help her and make up for it."

Jude watched in silent awe as Arden crumbled, falling easily for Mary Eunice's false innocence. The devil had taught her how to lie with ease. Arthur nodded and lowered his hand.

"I understand. You can stay with her. I'll inform Sister Lenore that you won't need to abide by your curfew tonight."

"Thank you." She gave him a small smile and sniffled one last time before bending to help pick Lana up from the ground.

"No. You get away from me!" Lana yelled.

"Ms. Winters," Dr. Arden said. "If you don't want to cooperate I'm sure we can give you some sedatives and knock you out for a few days. In that case I could leave you in the care of Sister Mary Eunice with no trouble." Lana glared at him, weighing the options in her head. Mary Eunice watched, wondering whether it would be worse, in Lana's opinion, to be stuck arguing with someone she hated, or to be unconscious and completely defenseless with someone she hated.

"Help me up, Sister," Lana said to Mary Eunice, still staring at Arden. She'd made the safest decision. "You're all sadistic bastards," she muttered. Jude stood and stayed beside Arden as Lana was guided away.

"Enough excitement," the nun-in-charge called as they left. "Time for bed."

Mary Eunice led Lana out of the common room and into the infirmary. She picked the last bed, closest to the wall, and made Lana sit in a chair next to it.

"I'll get you a clean uniform. I can bring you a cloth and some warm water so you can-"

"Drop the act." Lana was looking at her with pure disgust, but she kept her own face from revealing any hurt.

"What do you mean?" She asked sweetly. She knew exactly what Lana meant.

"You want to watch me suffer? Go ahead. Don't pretend you give a shit now." Mary Eunice shifted, but kept listening to Lana's bitter words. "What are you gonna do, huh? Feed me some more poisoned pills and tell everyone I kicked the bucket from blood loss? You'd get a kick out of it, she sneered." I know you would. You act part of the innocent nun pretty well… I bet you'll even get away with it."

"Ms. Winters, I'm not going to kill you. I'm trying to help you."

"Like hell you are!" Lana paused as her stomach cramped again. Mary Eunice could see that she was hurt and tired, but she refused to let her guard down or admit any weakness. Lana groaned.

"Do you need something? A glass of water?"

"I don't need anything from you," she said through gritted teeth. "Just get away from me."

"No," she replied forcefully. She was sick of being pushed away. Lana needed help. If she couldn't accept that Mary Eunice had changed, well that made no difference to the nun. Lana was just going to have to deal with it. Mary Eunice bent to Lana's level and forced the other woman to look at her, speaking slowly and clearly. "You need me. You're in pain and you're tired and you need to be taken care of. I'm not going to hurt you and I'm not going to let you sit here and suffer by yourself. What I _am_ going to do is get you some water and towels so you can clean yourself up. And then I'm going to get you a new uniform. And we're going to sit here and I'm going to reassure you that you'll be okay until you need something else. Then we'll repeat that process for as long as it takes for that thing to be out of you. Once it's over you can resume hating me, but I did this to you and I am going to stay here and make sure I put it right… Understood?"

Lana's face was blank. Mary Eunice didn't move. Her heart was racing and she was silently cursing herself. What if she had been too mean? Lana continued to stare at her, expressionless, and it filled Mary Eunice with dread. She must have done something wrong. She still wasn't used to controlling herself or being so forceful. Any second, Lana would call her another name or spit at her or hit her like Kit had. She deserved it. Why had she thought she could do this?

To her surprise, Lana finally nodded.

"Fine… But I still don't trust you." She didn't sound so certain now, but Mary Eunice stood and sighed with relief.

"That's okay. As long as you're willing to let me help, it'll be alright." They looked at each other for another long moment before both women snapped out of their thoughts. "I'll be back with your things. Try to relax."

"Sure." She leaned back against the chair and Mary Eunice left the room.

Things would still be tense, but it was a start.


	6. Chapter 6

_This took longer than I expected, mostly because I don't sit down with a plan. The more I write the less sure I am of where things are going. But that's half the fun I guess! _

_Thanks again for the reviews and follows! Enjoy!_

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-

The sound of crying woke Mary Eunice in the middle of the night. For a moment she was confused before she remembered that she had spent the night in the infirmary to take care of Lana Winters. She got up quietly and crossed the darkened room to the bed where Lana was sitting up, crying as she looked down at the blood in her lap.

Without speaking, Mary Eunice left to get more towels and another clean uniform. She came back and stripped the sheets from the bed and replaced them while Lana went to the bathroom to get rid of the blood she was covered in. When Lana returned, she went back to the bed and lay down with her back to Mary Eunice. After a few seconds of silence she started crying again.

"Ms. Winters?" Mary Eunice asked cautiously. "Are you okay?"

"Of course I'm not." Lana must have tried to sound angry, but the crying made her sound broken and small instead.

An ache started in Mary Eunice's chest and, against her better judgment, she went and sat on the bed beside the crying woman. She stroked Lana's hair and started humming a tune that sprang from somewhere in her memory.

Her childhood had been pleasant enough. She'd been an only child and her mother had died when she was young. This song was the only part of her mother that she remembered— that and a soft touch, playing with her hair, with the sweet tune sending her to sleep.

Mary Eunice's parents had been very much in love. When her mother died, her father had been devastated. He still loved Mary Eunice and took care of her until his own death when she was fifteen, but he'd been distant and she had found herself lacking something important. Without her mother—or any other female relatives that cared enough to teach her how to be a woman— she had never grown up.

She'd spent the years until she turned eighteen living with her father's sister, Celeste, in Boston. Celeste had been loud and had too many children. Mary Eunice had spent a lot of time helping at the local church just to get out of the house. While she was there she'd felt a sense of peace and a certain right-ness in the words of God. The decision to become a nun was easy.

When she told them she was joining a convent, her family didn't try to stop her or tell her they would miss her. She didn't have any friends either. The kids she'd met in school had always teased her for being shy, and she'd been the subject of many jokes over the years.

She had no one to stay for or live for. So she gave herself to God and sacrificed any other future she could have had.

Now, comforting Lana and thinking of her mother, she felt a sharp pang of longing for the possible life she'd given up. And she realized that Lana might have been feeling the same thing. As if reading Mary Eunice's mind, Lana sniffed and spoke.

"I couldn't have raised that child," she whispered. "I would have resented him because of Oliver. I wouldn't have given him the love he deserved."

"It's better this way. You both would have suffered." Lana nodded, but kept crying. Mary Eunice stayed, humming and comforting Lana until she was quiet. After that, she sat for a long time and kept stroking Lana's hair. She thought Lana was asleep until she broke the silence again.

"Why are you being so nice to me?" Mary Eunice sighed and removed her hand from Lana's hair.

"I'm not being nice, I'm just being decent." Lana chuckled slightly.

"Compared to what I'm used to, this is nice. It's the best I've been treated since I set foot in here."

"I know… I'm sorry. Some of that poor treatment was from me. I couldn't help it… I wish I could have." Lana rolled over carefully so she could look at Mary Eunice.

"You really were possessed by something." It wasn't a question, but Mary Eunice answered anyway.

"Yes. It was awful. I was trapped in my own body, watching myself do terrible things." She shook her head and looked at the floor. Lana reached out hesitantly and set a hand on her arm.

"I didn't know. I'm sorry I was so cruel the other day. I just didn't know what else to do. After being trapped with Thredson and… the pregnancy… I didn't trust you. I didn't want you to hurt Jude again either. She may be tough and mean, but she was someone else after she got shocked. It was terrifying… I'm sorry."

She had apologized. That meant that she believed Mary Eunice. A feeling of relief overwhelmed Mary and she could barely contain her happiness.

"I understand. I would have been afraid if I were you. It wasn't your fault." She set her hand over Lana's and smiled. "You're going to be okay and that is all that matters. I'm here and we're going to get through all of this and once you're strong enough, I'm going to get you out of here. You and Kit and Grace and Jude are going to be free. It's all going to work out. Just rest and you'll be alright. Okay?"

"Okay," she said, smiling back. There was part of her that was reluctant to get her hopes up, but she felt the warmth spark in her chest anyway. She rolled back onto her side and Mary Eunice got up from the bed. "Thank you." Mary Eunice paused, thinking of some way to tell Lana she didn't need to be thanked. The explanation wouldn't come, so she simply said goodnight and went back to bed.

-x-x-x-x-

In the morning, another nurse was assigned to look after Lana for the rest of her stay in the infirmary. Mary Eunice hadn't wanted to leave, but Dr. Arden was insistent that she try to let go and forgive herself for the medication mishap. He told her to follow him and led the way down to his office, gesturing for her to sit across from him as he settled in behind his desk.

"Are you feeling better, Sister?" She sat down in the chair and smoothed out her habit.

"Better about what?" He frowned. She knew he could sense the slow change in her demeanor that had been happening since her encounter with Shachath, and he was concerned.

"I understand that the possession was difficult," he said. "But I am afraid for you. You're handling this ordeal in a… strange manner." Considering her actions carefully, she furrowed her brow and clasped her hands in her lap.

"What do you mean?"

"You're different," he replied immediately. "There's a darkness over you. It's making you colder and you've become detached. You're lacking some of the qualities I've come to appreciate in you." It was obvious that he'd been thinking about this a lot. That hit a nerve and she shook her head in disbelief, the confusion and innocence falling from her face.

"I was possessed by the devil. My body was held hostage and used for evil, _disgusting_ things. Do you expect me to carry on like it never happened? Did you think I wouldn't be changed by that?" She felt a tug somewhere in her mind, pulling her towards anger, and she knew she needed to calm down. She lowered her voice and took a slow breath. "Of course I'm not the same, Arthur."

"You never called me that before." Mary Eunice glared at him. Something snapped at the pathetic expression on his face and acid coursed through her veins, making her bitter. Suddenly, she wanted to hurt him.

_Good girl. Let it out._

"Would you prefer me to call you _Hans_?" She hissed.

"Mary Eunice!" He looked equally shocked and disgusted. "That is out of line! You're acting like a child!"

"No!" She roared, leaning forward in the chair. "I'm not! That's your problem, isn't it? That I'm not acting like the innocent little girl you're used to?" His jaw dropped and his face reddened as he tried to come up with a response, but she kept going. "I am different and you can't stand it! You wanted me to stay innocent and pure and stupid forever. Well, guess what? That's over, Arthur. I'm not your doe-eyed little helper anymore.

"I've grown up and I see you for what you are. You are a sick and pathetic old man. You're cruel and demented and there is something deeply wrong with you. There always has been. I don't know what I thought I admired in you, but it doesn't exist." The silence after her words seemed to stretch and warp between them. The hurt in his eyes was what made her realize what had happened. As quickly as it had come, her viciousness disappeared and she was left feeling sick. She opened her mouth and closed it again, unsure of how to fix what she'd just done. "I'm so sorry," she whispered. "I didn't mean-"

"Yes you did." Arthur's expression was pure disappointment. Mary Eunice couldn't tell whether it was directed at her or at himself. "You may not have meant to say it, but you've been thinking about it. And the worst part is that you're right. I've never been a good man. I already knew that. And I did want you to stay pure. I thought you might be the only one in this place to keep their innocence. I wanted that for you. But you've outgrown it."

Mary Eunice stared at the floor. She'd never felt so many conflicting emotions. She knew that the anger she'd just unleashed wasn't her own. The same leftover evil that had been whispering into her mind had caused the outburst. The idea of hurting Dr. Arden was upsetting, but it had to be done and he was right in believing that she was far past the childish purity he had loved.

As painful as it was, she knew with absolute certainty that she was better off this way. She needed to grow up sooner or later. It had just taken extreme circumstances to teach her what it meant to be an adult.

"I'm still sorry," she said. "But this is for the best." He looked at her and opened his mouth to argue, but she shook her head. She reached across the desk and slid her hands into his. "I needed this. I couldn't have been a child forever. No one is meant to stay that way…" He looked down at their hands, held together on the desk, and sighed.

"The pure are lucky. They're not troubled by the cruelty and darkness around them. They live in blissful ignorance." She shook her head. He had never known innocence, so he couldn't know the bitter-sweet realizations that came with losing it.

"The pure aren't lucky." She smiled sadly at him. He may have been intelligent, but she was wiser now. She knew more about evil than he ever could. "They're easy targets for the wickedness in this world. And I'm glad I'm done being a victim." With one last apologetic squeeze, she released his hands and left the office.


	7. Chapter 7

_This one took forever because I've been so busy with rehearsals and college auditions. The first audition went well, but I have another on Friday so I don't know when the next update will be. I'll try to have another done over this break though! Thanks again to the reviewers!_

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-

"How is she?" Jude asked, standing to meet Mary Eunice as she entered the common room. She had been asking every nun who passed, but none of them had answered her. She needed to make sure Lana wasn't having any trouble. The girl had suffered enough for Jude's selfish mistake. The young nun smiled, her entire body relaxing as soon as she saw Jude.

"She's doing fine. There's another nun looking after her, but so far nothing has gone wrong." Mary Eunice looked over her shoulder at the nun supervising the room, and then nodded towards a couch. Jude sat down and watched Mary Eunice pick up cards and game pieces from the coffee table. "We talked last night and I think she finally believes me," she beamed. Jude couldn't help but smile back.

"But are you sure she's alright?" She asked seriously. Mary Eunice nodded. "Good… And how are you?"

Mary Eunice paused and thought about it. She was already beginning to make up for what the devil had done in her name. All she had to do was get Jude, Lana, and the other innocent prisoners out, and then she could start pushing to make herself heard. She had been in charge for a few weeks already and she was sure she could bring herself back to the top. Something inside told her she was on the right track. For the first time in weeks, she felt like she had a chance. She smiled.

"Better." A few patients yelped as the door was thrown open again. A figure swept through the room at full speed and Mary Eunice's blood turned cold.

"What the _hell_ did you do?!" Oliver Thredson growled. She could feel the pure fury pulsing around him. His hand shot out and pulled her forward by her habit.

Jude stood, but she knew there was nothing she could do to stop Thredson. He would kill Mary Eunice before he let her get away with what she'd done to his child. She looked to her startled prodigy and waited, praying that the girl would figure out what to do.

Mary Eunice stared, wide-eyed and silent, her brain moving too fast to keep up. Thoughts flashed through her mind, but she couldn't make sense of them. She tried to calm down and piece them together; Thredson was evil. He had respected and feared the evil in Mary Eunice. Mary Eunice wasn't evil anymore. He was a killer. And he was pissed. He had wanted that baby more than anything. He would kill her if she didn't do something now.

The solution hit her at last.

"Oliver," she said calmly and coldly. "What do you think you're doing?" Her brows knit together and she shook her head. "I thought you understood the arrangement between us. I made your place perfectly clear when I released you." Jude let out a silent sigh of relief. Mary Eunice glanced at her, and then looked back to Thredson. There was no way he knew that the devil was gone.

He stood for a moment, unsure of what was happening, his eyes flicking between her look of disapproval and the fistful of black fabric in his hand. "You-" he began.

"Let go," she interrupted. He did so immediately and took a step back. Oliver seemed to realize that snapping at her was a mistake, because when he finally spoke again his voice was low.

"What did you do to my son?" He whispered, all viciousness melting into fearful, fatherly concern. "I was supposed to meet with Lana today and they told me she's in the infirmary. They said you gave her pills and th- that she- that the baby-"

"Oliver, honestly, do you believe I would do that to you?" He swallowed and then shook his head. She pulled him towards a quiet corner of the room so he would feel like they weren't being overheard.

"But what happened? It has to be true. She's there and he's… gone. Dr. Arden told me. He said it was a mistake, that you told him-" she cut him off again, stepping close and putting her hand on his cheek. He had a weakness for contact, and for mother figures. She ignored the desire to shudder from disgust, instead smiling softly at him.

"I said what I had to say. Things around here are more complicated than you understand." His mouth opened and closed. She could tell that the touch had caught him off guard.

"Th- Then what did happen?" He stammered. She let her hand drop.

"She got the pills herself, of course. I had other patients to pay attention to. I caught her with the bottle, but it was too late. Half of it was gone."

"But why did you say it was your fault?" She sighed, like a mother might do when being asked too many questions by her curious child. Jude kept watching from the couch, admiring every second of Mary Eunice's manipulation. She had become quite the talented actress.

"We all have our parts to play, Oliver," she explained. "It looks better for me if it seems like I'm paying attention. And the innocent sob story I told Arthur is how I got assigned to look after her." He looked down, thinking through her story to see if it made sense. It didn't matter if it did, really, he wouldn't call her out. He was afraid and confused. Her idea of playing the devil was working better than she'd hoped. "I stayed with her for your baby's sake. I tried everything I could to save him, but there was nothing to be done." He looked like he might break down. She knew how unstable he was.

"That baby was going to have the life I never had," he said after a minute. He looked back up at her, the sadness in his face turning to blank rage. "That bitch destroyed my family." Mary Eunice knew the look in his eyes. It was the look of a remorseless killer.

"Exactly," she said quietly, without thinking. Her gut was pulling her towards a dangerous course. She didn't like what it was suggesting, but she didn't have any other choice, so she went on. "She has hurt you far too much. She should pay for it."

"Yes," he said, his eyes locking on hers. He thought she understood. There was a childish delight in his eyes. She fed into it, smiling widely up at him.

"We can take her down. She shouldn't be able to do this to you. We will make her suffer. Together."

"How?" He was practically shaking with anticipation. Mary Eunice's chest tightened. He looked just like an eager little boy trying to please his mother. She blocked the twisted feelings of sympathy and focused.

"We'll meet tomorrow night in your office, after lights out. I have a plan, but we'll have to go over it carefully and make sure nothing goes wrong. We can't afford to have people ask questions."

"Of course not," he agreed.

"Good. Now go carry on with your day," she instructed. "See your patients, work on files, just do what you have to do. Don't speak a word about this to anyone, and stay away from Ms. Winters."

Oliver nodded eagerly and began to walk away. At the last second, he changed his mind and turned back, catching her off guard by pulling her into a hug. Her stomach clenched as she imagined his hands roaming over her skin—fingers slipping over her before he slid the scalpel into her flesh—and she thought she might get sick. Before she could react, he spun on his heel and walked off. She stood frozen for a long time before Jude came to snap her out of it.

"You're getting too good at that," Jude chuckled.

"Seducing men?" Mary Eunice asked, moving to sit in a nearby chair.

"Is that what you did?" Jude looked at her with concern. "Did you offer yourself to him?"

"Not exactly. I don't-…" She stared at the ground.

"What did you do, then? You manipulated him, that much I saw, but for what?" Mary Eunice tilted her face slowly up to look at Jude.

"I'm meeting him tomorrow after lights out. I told him I'd help him get revenge on Lana," she whispered. Her true mission had begun to sink in and she was mortified.

"But that's not what you're going to do." She shook her head.

"No… I'm going to kill him. I have to." Jude pulled up a chair and sat in front of Mary Eunice.

"How did you come to that?" She was definitely worried now. Mary Eunice had killed before, but never directly. Even helping Lana kill that baby wasn't something she'd had to see or do. It had been a simple act of handing Lana the tools to do it herself. Thredson did have to be stopped, but she wasn't sure Mary Eunice could handle the guilt when the time came. "What are you going to do?"

"I don't know. I just know I have to. He'll kill her. Or me. Or both of us… He has to be stopped for good," she insisted. Her resolve was coming back and Jude could feel it. "I'll do it for all of those women. And for Lana and Kit. They deserve it." She looked at Jude, full of certainty. "I don't want to and I won't take pride in it, but I'll do it for them." Jude tried to contain her smile, but she couldn't. "What?" Mary Eunice asked, confused. Jude leaned forward and hugged her tightly.

"You may not take pride in it, but I am proud of you." Mary Eunice was still confused, but she hugged back. "This isn't what I wanted for you, but you can do it. I know you can. Just know that and keep it with you when the time comes."

"Okay," she said softly. She stayed in the warm embrace, ignoring the strange looks from the patients and nuns, thanking God for blessing her with Jude.


	8. Chapter 8

_I am so incredibly sorry for how long this chapter took. I was completely exhausted after my Boston audition and slept through the entire weekend. This week has been crazy and March is only going to get worse until this musical is over, but I swear I will keep writing._

_Again, I cannot thank you guys enough for reading, especially those who review. I am eternally grateful. Enjoy._

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Jude slammed down a ball of dough and rolled it under her hands. Bakery day was her favorite day of the Briarcliff patient rotation. The work in the bakery was actually surprisingly therapeutic. She wasn't sure how much she had believed that line while she was in charge, but she saw how true it was now. The dough helped her work out her aggression and the frustration of having nothing else to do.

"Hello, Jude," a voice said behind her. She twisted around to see Pepper putting on her own apron.

"Morning, Pepper."

"I've been hearing some interesting things about you and a certain young nun," she said, not wasting any time. She picked up a ball of dough and started working beside Jude.

"Sister Mary Eunice you mean?"

"Yes. Some of the nuns have been talking. They said the two of you were getting quite cozy," she smirked. "Hugging in the common room, apparently. That's a little odd."

"Oh, shut up." Jude teased. "The girl needs me."

"She has been acting quite strangely since the exorcism." Jude stopped kneading and turned.

"How did you know about that?" She studied the pin-head through narrowed eyes before figuring out the answer herself. "Ah. That gift from the green men told you."

"It did," Pepper replied smugly, not ceasing her work. "That and the crucifix burn on her neck." Jude frowned. "You weren't very subtle when you showed it to Kit and Lana."

"I guess not," she grumbled, returning to her dough. "Still, the girl needs help. She's confused and lost."

"Like you were before you joined the church?" Jude made a face.

"Some days I wish you'd stayed a pin-head." Pepper chuckled. It wasn't really true. Most days, Pepper was the only reasonable person she talked to. It was nice to have her company. She shuddered to think of how alone she would be without Pepper. She sighed and shrugged. "She is important to me. She always has been."

"I know."

Jude supposed most of the people here knew. She'd never hidden her favor for the girl—putting her in charge when everyone else had given her pitying glances, giving her every opportunity to prove herself and rise as Jude's right hand. She wanted Mary Eunice to succeed more than any other nun she'd worked with. For some reason, she had always been special.

"Have you heard any other interesting things lately?" Jude asked, changing the subject.

"Well…" Pepper stopped kneading.

"What?" Jude watched Pepper carefully. Everything about her had tensed and she was suddenly interested in picking stray grain seeds out of her dough. "You know something big. Something bad… For all of us." Pepper met her eyes and nodded. "What is it?" She sniffed and spoke quietly.

"I overheard the Monsignor on the phone with a representative of the state." Jude understood immediately and felt her insides turn to stone.

"He's turning Briarcliff over to the government. He's abandoning us." Her brow furrowed and she tried to understand why he would do this now, after everything. He had been with Briarcliff from the very beginning, making sure the asylum succeeded. The Monsignor had fought tooth and nail to keep this place in order, even covering for Arden and trying to get Jude out of the way when her suspicions got dangerously close to the truth. Why leave after his greatest success? He had singlehandedly removed the devil's influence. Freeing Mary Eunice would have been near-impossible for even the most skilled exorcist. It was practically a miracle. Unless...

"My God," Jude gasped. She stepped away from the table and untied her apron, tossing it in with the others.

"Where are you going?" Pepper whispered.

"I have to talk to the Monsignor." The nun overseeing the bakery didn't see her rush from the room.

-x-x-x-x-x-

Lana was sitting up in her bed in the infirmary, trying to focus on whatever book they'd handed to her. She couldn't stop thinking about Oliver. He hadn't been allowed in to see her, but she'd heard him arguing with one of the nuns yesterday and it made her nervous.

Throughout her life, she'd been forced to be on guard because of who she was. People had always suspected that she was a lesbian and treated her differently. Her parents had disowned her when she came out. They kept it quiet to hide their own shame, but people knew anyway. Occasionally she would meet some super-traditionalist psycho who thought she was trying to corrupt their way of life and every so often she got threatening letters, midnight prank calls, and hateful glances, but she had never feared for her life. Those people were just ignorant assholes. Oliver was different. He was insane. Lana was terrified.

One of the nuns passed by, carrying a pile of sheets. "Excuse me," Lana said. The nun halted and smiled at her.

"Feeling all right today, Ms. Winters?"

"Better," she assured. "Have you seen Sister Mary Eunice? I need to speak to her."

"Right here," a voice called. Mary Eunice rounded the curtain and nodded to the nun before turning to Lana. "I was just coming in to talk to you. Carry on, Sister Florence." The other nun nodded and walked out, leaving them alone. Mary Eunice waited until she was gone to sit on the edge of Lana's bed.

"Oliver tried to see me yesterday," Lana started, tossing the book aside. "He knows about the baby. He's going to do something crazy. I'm afraid he might even kill me. He could make it look like an overdose or blood loss or something, I know he could. He's a maniac, but he's smart. He knows what he's doing." Mary Eunice held up her hand and Lana stopped. She was panicking, and there was no way that would help her.

"I talked to him after they turned him away yesterday and I'm going to meet him tonight." Lana shook her head.

"So? You think you can talk him out of murdering me? Mary Eunice, he's fucking crazy." The nun made a face at the bluntness of the statement.

"Please don't say that," she sighed.

"Sorry. _Sister_ Mary Eunice, he's fucking crazy," Lana repeated, raising her eyebrows.

"That's not-"

"I know that's not what you meant, but we have more important things to worry about than profanity, so get over it and tell me what you're going to do to help me." Mary Eunice sighed again, reminding herself what Lana had been through in the past month. Thinking about how hard her ordeal had been kept Mary Eunice from slapping her. She must have sensed the nun's frustration because she closed her eyes and apologized, shaking her head. "I'm sorry. I keep forgetting that this hasn't been easy for you either."

"It's fine. There's still work to be done and I have to do it. I can handle it," she said firmly. Lana saw that she was probably reassuring herself more than anyone. She looked back to Lana. "And I am going to help you."

"Okay. How?" Mary Eunice swallowed.

"I'm going to kill him. I know evil, and that's all I see when I look at him. This is the only way to stop him." Lana nodded without hesitation. "I'm going to ask Dr. Arden for help. I'm not sure if he'll listen, but I'll come up with something if I have to. But you're going to be safe. I'll make sure of that. All right?"

"Yes. Thank you." Mary Eunice smiled nervously and stood to leave. Lana leaned forward and grabbed her wrist. "Please be careful," she implored.

"Of course. I'll be okay." She smiled again, genuinely this time, and Lana let her leave.

-x-x-x-x-x-

"Timothy!" Jude shouted, pounding on the door to his office. She had gone straight there from the bakery. "Timothy I know you're in there! We need to have a conversation!"

The door opened to reveal the Monsignor and a tall man Jude had never seen.

"Thank you, Mr. Matthews, and pardon the intrusion," Timothy said politely, gesturing to Jude. He shook hands with the man, a government employee judging by his crisp and professional attire. "I'm glad you could come down today. Your office will be in touch?"

"Certainly, Father. We'll make our decision after the official tour next week."

"Wonderful," Timothy beamed. The man put on his hat, nodded to Jude, and left. "Now, what did you need so urgently, Jude?" He smiled patronizingly. She stared at him, noting every detail of his appearance. She picked up on the fact that he didn't have his precious cross with him.

"Where's your rosary, Monsignor?" She asked. "For a man of your high standing in the church, it seems odd to see you without it." His smile disappeared.

"You are very observant for a woman whose brain has been submitted to such torture." There was coldness and an edge in his voice now. He wasn't bothering to hide and Jude's worst fear was confirmed.

"You've moved on to another host I see." The smile returned, more pleased now.

"This one suits my needs more effectively. The girl was sweet, but she lacked true authority and drive. She was always so keen on fighting. Your Monsignor lacks her… moral motivation. He prefers power to purity."

"That is your fault," Jude sneered. "You've corrupted him like you corrupt all things. You used her to do it, too." Timothy shrugged.

"The sex did help break his resolve," he admitted. "It is the key to many a man's undoing… Or even some women," he added with a pointed look at Jude. He smirked and leaned forward. "And she was good."

"You're disgusting!" Jude hissed, shoving him and backing into the hallway. "She didn't deserve that! Any of it!"

"And he does?" He raised an eyebrow.

"If he's allowing this, then yes he does!" The devil laughed, turning Timothy's usual chuckle into something ugly and cruel.

"And to think you used to be so fond of him. Tell me, when Mary Eunice explained what happened between us, how long did it take for the jealousy to fade?" Jude growled in frustration and turned away, storming down the stairs. "It's a shame she wouldn't share our road to Rome! We could have had so much fun!" He laughed again and shut the door.

At the bottom of the stairs, Jude ran straight into Mary Eunice.

"Sister Jude, what's wrong? I heard the Monsignor shouting." Her stomach still squirmed when he was mentioned and she hadn't seen him since the exorcism. Jude looked at Mary Eunice strangely. "What is it?"

Jude was still lost in a haze of anger. "He's gone," she said with disgust. "There's another power ruling him now."

"The Monsignor?" Mary Eunice asked fearfully.

"That filth gave himself to the devil." She sounded crazy, but Mary Eunice knew she was telling the truth. Her heart collided with the floor.

"No," she breathed. "God, no."

"He's betrayed the Lord!" Jude screamed. Another nun brushed past Mary Eunice and grabbed Jude.

"Back to your room, Judy," the nun said over Jude's cries.

"The devil is here! He's given up the fight! He's betrayed the Lord! He's betrayed us all!" Her voice faded as she was pulled away, but Mary Eunice wasn't listening. She stared at the floor, not feeling the tears that poured silently from her eyes, knowing only the sensation of the complete and utter destruction of hope.


	9. Chapter 9

_It has been over a month so allow me to apologize for starting a story in the middle of Musical season. The shows went well and then I finished all of my ridiculous theatre work and THEN got into a wonderful college, which I visited today. So I was very very busy with all of that. But it is done now! And I can return to regular updates! _

_I want to thank those who are sticking with me and continued to question me about updates. It means a lot that you wanted more! Without further ado, I present you the next chapter. Enjoy._

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Leaves and twigs crunched under May Eunice's feet as she walked numbly through the forest. There was nothing she could do now to save the rest of them. The Monsignor would defeat her if she stood against him. More than defeat, he could crush her.

She kept walking. Without the threat of the raspers, the forest was peaceful. The wind was loud and cold, but she didn't feel it blowing against her face. She'd been walking for almost an hour. She hadn't even known the expanse of trees went on this far. A loud cracking sound came from beside her and she paused.

"Where are you going?" A voice asked. Mary Eunice jumped and backed into a tree. The angel of death gazed at her from behind a fallen branch. She didn't look angry, merely curious and patient. Mary Eunice swallowed and looked down, away from the angel's all-seeing eyes, her fingers, anxious, traced the ridges of bark on the tree behind her.

"You already know where I'm going," she said in a small voice. Shachath shook her head. She stepped over the branch, towards Mary Eunice.

"No, I don't. Because neither do you." She watched Mary Eunice carefully. "You don't have a plan. You had a 'fight or flight' choice and you chose flight." Mary Eunice stayed silent. Shachath was right, of course. She took a shaky breath, trying to control the urge to sob.

All of the fear she'd been holding back since the exorcism had come flooding back with unexpected force as soon she heard about the Monsignor. It had been less than an hour and she was already running away. She glanced back up at Shachath and shook her head. Her lip quivered and she couldn't hold back the tears any longer. She slid down the tree trunk and sat slumped on the ground, sobbing loudly into her knees.

"I can't fight him!" She cried. Her voice sounded so pathetic and weak. She groaned and tried to wipe her eyes, but she was already crying too hard to stop. A hand gently rested on her shoulder and she covered her face again, unable to calm her breathing. "I sat and thought and tried to find a way. I just cried. I'm still weak. I can't do it."

"You can. And you are only weak if you keep running. It's not the crying or the fear that makes you weak; it's the _submission_ to those fears."

"But-" Shachath's hand squeezed her shoulder.

"Don't doubt yourself. I told you you were strong because it's the truth. I know you like I know all living souls and you would do well to listen to me." Mary Eunice nodded and took several deep breaths to calm herself down. "Good. Now tell me what you plan to do."

Mary Eunice thought for a moment, running through a list of options and other things she had to take care of first.

"I have to save him for last. I need to get Lana Winters and the other innocent people out of here before I take him on." Her stomach clenched. "And I need to take care of Thredson tonight. I don't know how I'm going to do it."

"You were going to ask Arden for help before, weren't you?" Mary Eunice nodded.

"Right. I was. How did you-?"

"I've been keeping an eye on you. You told Ms. Winters you weren't sure if he would help you. He will." Mary Eunice had finally stopped crying. She wiped her face and met the angel's eye.

"He will?" She asked.

"Of course he will. All you have to do is ask." Shachath stepped back and held out her hand. Mary Eunice hesitated for a moment before grabbing it and pulling herself up. She brushed the dirt from her habit and looked nervously to Shachath again.

"You're sure?"

"I am," she assured.

"Okay... I can do this," she said quietly.

"Yes you can. I will be watching and waiting, but I will not interfere. This job is yours to do."

"Thank you," Mary Eunice said. "For everything."

"Don't thank me yet. We'll see each other again." Shachath disappeared.

"I can do this," Mary Eunice whispered to herself. "I can do this." She turned and began the long way back towards Briarcliff, feeling stronger already.

-x-x-x-x-x-

"This will do it," Arden said, holding up a syringe of clear liquid. Mary Eunice was perched on the edge of his desk, watching him with bright curiosity.

"What is it?" Mary Eunice asked, reaching to take it. He pulled it away.

"It will do the job. That's all you need to know." He didn't want to give it to her. She had come into his office shivering and red-faced, launching immediately into an explanation of the Monsignor's possession, her intent to run away, and some kind of sudden revelation she'd experienced in the forest.

Mary Eunice had conveniently left out the appearance and involvement of Shachath, but she told him the rest. She'd told him she needed his help to kill Oliver Thredson in order to start her plan to overthrow the Monsignor, and that she would go to him after lights-out whether Arthur helped or not.

Naturally, Arthur's instinct to protect the young nun overshadowed all of his objections. He would make sure she killed Thredson without getting hurt and without leaving any evidence.

"Just inject it into the side of his neck," he instructed, capping the syringe and handing it over to her. "Make sure you don't inject yourself."

"God, Arthur, I'm not an idiot." She scoffed. He paused and stared at her with concern. Mary Eunice realized how that had sounded. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to say it like that." Arden turned away.

"I know. It just… It hasn't gotten any easier to accept what's happened to you," he admitted. He picked up the bottles he'd been sorting through and stored them back in one of his glass cupboards.

"I know," Mary Eunice said. "Well… Thank you. I'll call down here when it's done." Arthur made a noise of agreement, not turning to look at her. Mary Eunice slid down from his desk and left.

-x-x-x-x-x-

Mary Eunice stood outside the door. She'd been there for almost a full minute, but couldn't bring herself to knock. She was afraid to face Thredson. Something about him was utterly terrifying. It might have been the coldness in his eyes, or that sickening eager-puppy expression he wore at the idea of killing Lana, but either way it was keeping Mary Eunice from knocking.

She closed her eyes and shook herself, trying to push away the anxiety that made her muscles tense and twitch. She rolled her shoulders and neck, begging her body to comply. The devil carried her body a certain way and she was painfully familiar with every detail of its posture. Her shoulders went back—just a little farther forward, maybe?—and she could sense the changes in the aura she was radiating.

Once it felt right, she opened her eyes. She could feel her face automatically adopting an expression of cold focus. She could do this. Right now, she _was_ the devil. She felt for the syringe in the front pocket of her habit, just to check one last time. It was there. Good. She raised her hand and knocked three times.

The door opened to reveal Oliver, his mouth widening into a smile when he saw her.

"I was wondering when you'd get here," he said, stepping aside as she brushed past him. "I thought maybe you'd changed your mind."

"Why on Earth would I do that?" He closed the door and walked around to sit behind his desk. She hopped easily onto the polished wood surface, facing him. She looked at him expectantly. He swallowed and looked away from her.

"Most women in my life abandon me." Mary Eunice leaned forward, her eyes narrowed.

"And you think I'm like most women?" Oliver straightened up quickly and shook his head. He heard the slight edge in her voice. She may have been a woman, but she was different. She was something more powerful and far more dangerous than just a woman. That, he knew.

"Of course not." She smiled.

"Good. Lana, however, is an ordinary woman. And I'm here to discuss what we should do about her." Oliver's brows came together.

"I thought you said you had a plan?" She silently cursed herself for not keeping track of what she'd said to him yesterday. He was an observant and intelligent man. She didn't let her façade slip.

"Did I say anything about _not _having a plan?" His mouth opened and then closed.

"No. I suppose you didn't."

"Exactly. Because I'm here to discuss the plan. Your enthusiasm is obviously inhibiting your ability to hear," she snapped. Oliver kept eye contact for a moment, not wanting to take the submissive role so easily. Mary Eunice kept her face expressionless and stared at him until he finally broke and looked down at the desk in front of him.

Manipulating Oliver reminded her of the dog she'd lived with in her aunt's house. Champ, her aunt's black and white Border Collie, had barked at everyone except Mary Eunice. He was the closest thing she'd had to a friend in the three years she lived in that house. She had watched her Aunt Celeste use the same staring technique to show the dog his place. She reminded him with constant yelling and abuse until one day he finally bit her. That evening, Champ was given a bullet to the head and a crude grave in the backyard.

Mary Eunice had cried and begged for Celeste to spare him. _"He didn't mean to. He was scared! He just needs to get out more. I can walk him or take him out to the woods to run around after school. I'll take care of him, I'll do anything! Please don't kill him!"_

Aunt Celeste had scowled, dragging Champ out the back door by the scruff of his neck with her uncle's big gun in one hand.

"_There's nothin' you can do, Mary Eunice. Bad dogs get put down."_

Mary Eunice watched Oliver Thredson shift his glasses on his nose. _Bad dogs get put down._ He was as bad as they got.

"So what's your plan?" He finally asked, looking up with that excited spark. She put on a twisted grin and pulled the capped syringe out of her pocket.

"We inject her with this. She's already been in the infirmary for a few days. She's been looking better, but she's still bleeding," Mary Eunice said. She frowned and faked concern. "Maybe she's been bleeding a little too much. And they have been giving her an awful lot of medication. If someone were to make a mistake I wouldn't even be there to help. They removed her from my care days ago." She shook her head.

"Just one slip could have an adverse effect, you know. One wrong vial—vomiting, internal bleeding, extreme pain, _death_. And with so many nuns in and out of there with so many meds, they might never figure out what caused it. It could even be murder for all we knew… and she'd never get any justice. Just a spot on a shelf as a little can of ash." She looked directly at Thredson and smirked. "What a shame."

His face was bright and he smiled up at her. He was drinking in her every word. The idea of Lana's pain was causing him a sick degree of pure joy.

"You said it will hurt, right? She deserves to suffer. I don't want anything that will be too easy."

"Yes. I looked at the side-effects and overdose warnings on the label to make sure," she said. "I wanted something that would get her back for everything she's done to us-" She leaned over and rested her hand over his, in his lap. "-to _you,_" she purred.

Mary Eunice knew what she was doing. She could tell it was working by the change in his eyes—the mix of childish hope and some deranged kind of lust. She reminded herself again that she could do this.

"Oliver," she said softly. "You deserve so much more."

"I do?" He asked.

"Of course you do." She set the syringe nearby on the desk. She then took off his glasses and set them down before sliding over so she was sitting directly in front of him. "You're a great man, Oliver. I don't know how Lana could have missed it."

"Do you really think so?" He asked, smiling. She smiled back.

"I think you're exceptional," she gushed. "What you do takes so much skill and patience. And you've been clever enough to hide it all this time. I find you to be remarkable." She grabbed one of his hands and held it between both of hers. "You're incredibly talented," she murmured, lowering her voice and eyeing him.

He simply stared at her hands, caught by the realization that she was still touching him. She was expecting him to react soon. She was waiting for his other hand to slip up her habit and grab her thigh or make some kind of move for further skin contact. He wanted more and she could practically feel his desire radiating onto her. But he didn't react the way she had expected.

"No one has ever said that to me," he whispered. His eyes started tearing up and he pulled himself against her stomach, hugging her at the waist. "Nobody has ever acknowledged how hard I work."

"Well," she started, trying to adjust to the situation. He wasn't paying attention or looking at her. This was the time to strike. She just had to keep him occupied. "I know. I know what a hard life you've had," she said, picking up the syringe in one hand and stroking his hair with the other. "I know that you want affection. Even if you don't realize it, that's what you need. You just needed somebody to see you and care about you. And I do, Oliver." She paused and listened to him sob into her stomach. The sound covered up the click of her pulling the syringe cap off carefully with her teeth. His head was turned away from the syringe.

"I just wanted a mother. I wanted somebody to tell me I was good enough. I never had that." She moved her hand from his head to his neck, stroking his skin to feel for his artery.

"It must have been horrible. But you've grown so much. You've proven that you were worth it. Maybe your mother didn't see how special you were, but I do." He squeezed her tighter and she felt her heart ache. If someone had been around to tell him this when he was a child, this wouldn't be happening.

"Thank you," he sniffled. She poised the needle next to his neck, just out of his sight. "I can't tell you how much this means to me. Just thank you. You must be the only good person I've ever met in my life." She swallowed.

"I'm sorry it had to be this way," she whispered. As quickly as she could, she jabbed him with the needle and pushed the plunger.

"What-?" She held him close and locked his head against her stomach. He tried to scream, but her body muffled the sound.

There was no physical pain, she had lied about that, but she knew he would feel the pain of her betrayal and the paralyzing fear of knowing he was going to die. She supposed his victims must have felt that way when he killed them. She focused on those poor women to block out the overwhelming guilt as his hands clawed at her back, first violently, then weaker, and then stopped altogether. He was unconscious. He would be dead within minutes. She let him go and pushed the chair back from the desk.

Tears still covered his face and he looked so small. He was a scared little boy all his life.

She slid from the desk and picked up his phone. She dialed Dr. Arden's line. It rang once, twice-

"Hello?"

"It's done," she said, surprised that her voice worked at all.

"All right. I'll be right up." She hung up and leaned against the desk. She stared at Oliver, feeling the silence like a weight everywhere. She had done it. He was gone and she had single-handedly ended his life. She didn't know how she felt about it. Guilty, yes, but still… He had deserved it._ Bad dogs get put down._

She stared until she felt a stirring of air and saw a shadow pass through the room. Shachath didn't show herself, she just took him and left Mary Eunice alone.

"I'm sorry." She told his body.

Silence wrapped around her as soon as the words left her mouth. It strangled her and she struggled to breathe. She needed to redeem herself in some small way. She closed her eyes and prayed for the first time since she'd been exorcised. She prayed not for herself, but for Oliver and Dr. Arden and Lana and Jude and even for Kit and Grace. She prayed for the soul of the Monsignor. She prayed for everyone. They all needed help, so she prayed.

And she waited.


	10. Chapter 10

_I said regular updates but what I meant was "I promise I won't forget about this story please don't worry." This is short and late and I am an ass._

_Thank you for reading and sticking with me through this stupid wait! Here ya go!_

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-

"Check outside," Dr. Arden instructed. He he'd brought a wheelchair upstairs and put Thredson's body into it so they could wheel him to the crematorium. Mary Eunice had been unresponsive, staring blankly at the wall behind Thredson's desk, and he'd spent a few minutes trying to shake some life back into her. Eventually she came around, but she was still silent and mechanical in her movements.

Now, she peeked out of the office door to check for any oncoming guards. She looked back at him and nodded, the signal that they were in the clear, before stepping into the hall. Once Arden had wheeled the body out, she shut the door behind them.

They walked in silence to the service elevator, passing no one. This wasn't strange to Arthur. He had often entertained the eerie thought that the asylum did what it could to cover up the evil deeds that went on inside it.

They exited the elevator and entered the cremation room. He locked the door behind them and wheeled the chair up next to the furnace.

"This will take some time," he said, grunting, as he lifted Thredson onto the sliding platform. Mary Eunice stared silently. "We'll have time to move his car and all of his personal belongings from the premises while he bakes. He'll be nice and crispy for a while and then he'll be gone in about two hours."

"Don't say it like that," she said softly, still staring vacantly at the body.

"What?"

"What you said, you made him sound like an object—like you were… like you were baking a cake instead of burning a person. Don't do that," she mumbled.

Arthur looked at her curiously.

"Why do you suddenly have such an attachment to him?" He knew there was probably jealousy in his voice. He'd seen the state of Thredson's desk while he was in the office. The papers had all been pushed aside, leaving one clear space in the middle. It was a big enough space for a woman to sit. All sorts of ideas had flashed through his mind and he'd struggled to push them away. Now her strange behavior brought them back.

She had switched back to silence, not so much ignoring the question as being absorbed by her own thoughts. Arden tried again, this time stepping in front of her and blocking her view of Thredson's body.

"Sister, why do you care so much about him?" She started and looked up at him. "He was a criminal and a murderer and a lunatic. He was barely human. Why do you insist on giving him any respect at all?"

It took a moment for Mary Eunice to understand all of what he said, but finally her face twisted into an expression of disbelief.

"You were all of those things and more. So am I. What right do you have to tell me that I can't mourn him?" Arden opened his mouth to speak, but she interrupted him, speaking quickly, with a quiet fury he'd never seen. "I murdered him, Arthur. I manipulated him and made him trust me and I watched him cry, thinking he had found someone to understand him, and then I held him against me and felt him screaming as I ended his life. He died afraid and knowing full well that he had been lied to in the worst possible way. But I did it because_ I had to_." She paused and took a breath, trying to calm her anger. When she spoke again, the edge in her voice was gone and she sounded defeated. "He may not have been a good person, but he was still a person."

Arthur watched her as she stepped around him and moved towards Thredson. She carefully smoothed down his hair and straightened the collar of his shirt.

He saw her close her eyes and mutter what sounded like "God's work" before stepping away from him and flipping the switch on the side of the furnace. First, the flames roared to life. Mary Eunice waited, caught up in their bright flicker for several quiet minutes, and then hit the next switch, sending poor Oliver into their depths. The metal door slid shut behind him and she turned away.

Not knowing how to react, Arthur said nothing. She stood in front of the door with her back to him.

"Let's just finish this."

-x-x-x-x-x-

The next morning, Mary Eunice visited Lana.

"What happened? Did it work? Is he-" Lana stopped her questioning when she saw the nun's face. She looked exhausted. There were circles under her eyes and she walked as though she was trying not to collapse. "Are you all right?"

"Tired," Mary Eunice dismissed, sitting down in a chair beside the bed. She knew if she sat on the soft surface she might sink into it and never get up.

"Long night?" Lana asked. Mary Eunice frowned at her obvious question. "Right. Sorry."

"I didn't get to sleep much, but it's done."

"Done? Are you sure?" Lana felt excitement fill her. The thought that Thredson could be permanently gone was almost too good to believe. Mary Eunice nodded. Lana couldn't contain herself; she laughed out loud and then clapped her hand over her mouth. Tears of relief welled in her eyes.

Suddenly, she threw off her blankets and climbed out of bed. She wrapped her arms around Mary Eunice and whispered, "Thank you. Thank you so much."

"Ms. Winters!" Sister Lenore raised her eyebrows from the edge of the curtain. "You certainly seem to be looking better." Lana let go of Mary Eunice and stood fully, nodding.

"I do feel much better," she said. She smiled back at Mary Eunice. "I think I'd like to leave the infirmary today if that's all right."

"We'll check you over and if everything checks out you can go back with the other patients." It wasn't the perfect change, but to Lana anything might be better than sitting in that solitary bed all day. "Mary Eunice," she said, noticing the state of the girl sitting in the chair, "you look dreadful!"

"I'm okay, Sister," she assured, standing quickly.

"I don't believe you and I'm sure Dr. Arden would be furious if he saw you in this state." Mary Eunice stepped forward. She didn't want to be sent to her room when there was still so much to do. She was tired, but she had to keep moving.

"Please, Sister-"

"No, Mary Eunice. I want you to get some rest. Now." The older nun fixed her with a stare, daring her to argue again. Mary Eunice mumbled out her obedience and left—Lana calling out another thank you behind her—with no intention of going to bed.


End file.
